


Five Colors in Her Hair

by Jennrosee



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, F/M, Nerdward, Punkella
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-04-19
Updated: 2012-05-31
Packaged: 2017-11-03 22:48:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/386840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jennrosee/pseuds/Jennrosee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Conformity has always been the key to success in the sleepy town of Forks, Washington, but when the punky Bella Swan arrives, nerdy Edward Cullen learns it's okay to be a little different. The town of Forks will never be the same! Nerdward/Punkella</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N-Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine, nor is Edward, Bella, or anybody else.
> 
> ***Warning - The characters in this story are very OOC. Also, its rated M for language, school bullying, underage drinking, and maybe a little citrus. Don't say I didn't warn you! :)
> 
> Now that all of that is out of the way, this story is based on a banner by FatesLoveQueen. 
> 
> Many thanks to my amazing beta SqueakyZorro for helping me pull this all together and for her great ideas!

_All I can say is that my life is pretty plain  
I like watchin' the puddles gather rain  
And all I can do is just pour some tea for two  
and speak my point of view  
But it's not sane, It's not sane_

_I just want someone to say to me  
I'll always be there when you wake  
Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today  
So stay with me and I'll have it made_

_And I don't understand why I sleep all day  
And I start to complain that there's no rain  
And all I can do is read a book to stay awake  
And it rips my life away, but it's a great escape  
escape...escape...escape..._

_All I can say is that my life is pretty plain  
ya don't like my point of view  
ya think I'm insane  
It's not sane...it's not sane._

_I just want someone to say to me  
I'll always be there when you wake  
Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today  
So stay with me and I'll have it made_

_No Rain by Blind Melon_

\----------------------------------------------

The morning of Tuesday, January 18, started out like any other day.

I woke up.

I brushed my teeth.

I got dressed.

I turned on my Alienware Area-51 ALX.

Yep, it was just like any other day. But what I didn't know was that Tuesday, January 18, was the day she would come into my life, changing me, my family, and Forks High School, forever.

Maybe I should start at the beginning. You see, most of my life I've tried to stay hidden in the background where no one would notice me. It wasn't that I didn't like people; it was that _they_ didn't like _me_. I had a couple of friends at school, but mostly I found my sanctuary and friendships in the people I gamed with online. They were safe, they didn't judge, they didn't require face-to-face conversation, and most importantly, they were just as weird as I was.

Now you may be asking, what exactly is an Alienware Area-51 ALX? Well, it's only the best gaming computer currently available. My mom bought it for me for Christmas, and seriously, it was the best present I'd ever received, even better than the car I got for my sixteenth birthday.

Anyway, I'd woken up a bit earlier than usual that morning. The night before, my World of Warcraft guild had encountered a powerful werewolf we couldn't defeat, and I was determined to increase my stats before we continued our game after school. I'd been playing for a good hour when the shrill voice of the resident harpy sounded from behind me.

" _Edward_ , let's go! We're going to be late, and the new girl starts today. I want to get to her _before_ Lauren and Jessica do." Alice stood at my bedroom door, hands on her hips as she shot me her evil glare. My parents swore she and I were twins, but I'd never believed them, and I know Alice didn't either.

In the history of the world, I was pretty sure there had never been a pair of twins more different from each other than Alice and I. Physically, Alice barely reached five feet, and I was over six. She had short, spiky hair that made her look like she'd just stuck her finger in an electrical outlet, while mine hung long and wavy to my jawline.

And then there were our personalities. She was social, attractive, and popular, and I…was not. Oh, and just in case you're wondering, that whole psychic twin thing everybody likes to think exists, well, it didn't with Alice and me. And I was quite happy about that. No way would I want to be inside _her_ head.

"Do you mind, Alice? I have to increase my health and attack levels; my guild is counting on me. Besides, we're not going to be late."

Alice huffed and turned down the hall. "Emmett! _Emmett_ , will you please take me to school? Edward's playing his dweeb games again." Alice usually drove herself to school, but after the town police chief busted her and a couple of her friends riding in a car with an open container, my parents took her keys away for an unspecified amount of time. So, lucky me, I got to drive her to school in the morning. I hadn't done anything wrong. I didn't know why I was being punished, too.

"Well, hurry it the hell up then, Alice!" Emmett's voice boomed through the house. My older brother, Emmett, was a typical jock who dated the most beautiful girl in school. He was also the biggest guy in school, eclipsing even the football coach in height. He was a decent human being though and, unlike Alice, stuck up for me when things got rough. Of course, that just tended to make things worse in the long run.

The front door slammed as he and Alice left for school, and a few minutes later my mom came into my room. "Sweetheart, you're going to be late for school."

"I'm done, Mom," I said, standing up from my computer desk and grabbing my book bag off the floor.

I stopped in front of her as she pushed my hair behind my ears. "Can I make you some breakfast?"

"No, Mom, I'm not hungry. Thanks, though." The truth was I could never eat breakfast in the morning. My stomach was always too nervous, and this morning was even worse than usual. I was dreading school that day, not that I didn't dread it every day of my life, but my friends, Angela and Ben, were both out sick with the flu. That left me alone for the second day in a row, and if it was anything like the day before, I'd be eating lunch with Mrs. Miller in the library again.

"Okay, sweetie," my mom conceded with a sad smile. She could see right through me. She never said anything though. I think she tried to find ways to make things better for me, but there was really nothing that could, so she did things to make me happy at home, like buying me a three-thousand dollar computer.

"Bye, Mom." I kissed her cheek, grabbed my paper-bagged lunch from the kitchen counter, and prepared for my descent into the depths of the cesspool called high school.

^0-0^

Forks High School had a social hierarchy, which I'm sure was not much different than any other high school in the country, or world for that matter. The majority of the student body just sort of blended into the background, like the extras you see in those cliché teen movies, but then there were the students who stood out in some way, and in Forks' case they were the Richies, the Activities, and the Outcasts.

Each grade has its own leaders of sorts, and the junior class was blessed to have Alice as its ringleader of the Richies. Her groupies consisted of her boyfriend, Jasper Whitlock, Tyler Crowley, Austin Marks, Jennifer Ford, and Ashley Dowling. They didn't really do much, just sort of sat around talking about whatever new blah blah blah mommy and daddy had just bought them. The girls even left the price tags on their clothes the first time they wore them to prove they were truly designer. Ridiculous? Yes, but that was Alice.

Then there was Lauren Mallory, leader of the Activities, which included Jessica Stanley – those two were joined at the hip – Mike "the Dick" Newton, Eric Yorkie, and Katie Marshall. They were the jocks, the student government kids, the prom kings and queens. They were even bigger assholes than the Richies, but at least they actually did things.

Alice and Lauren were always fighting for social dominance, and it generally shifted back and forth between them. Their most recent fight was over who was going to get the new girl to join their group first. She hadn't even arrived yet, but I already felt sorry for her.

Finally, there were my friends, Ben Cheney and Angela Weber, and I – the Outcasts, the bottom of the social food chain. Ben spoke with a lisp and had bad skin, but he was the most talented artist in the school and had won awards for quite a few of his paintings. Angela was a bit rounder than the rest of the girls; she was also kind and extremely intelligent. She and Ben had crushes on each other, but both were too shy to do anything about it, so they just sort of admired each other from a distance. As for me, well, there was nothing really special about me. I was a hardcore gamer, and I had a zombie apocalypse survival plan but no real talents to speak of. I was simply a loser.

I pulled my silver Volvo into my usual spot next to Emmett's Jeep. When Mom and Dad gave the car to me, I guess they thought a cool car would help me fit in better. It didn't help me fit in, but at least the other cars in the parking lot didn't pick on it.

There were three locations in school someone of my social status dreaded the most – gym class, the cafeteria, and the parking lot. The last was the worst. You could fake an injury to get out of gym class; you could eat lunch in other locations; but you always, always had to cross the school parking lot.

As was my usual morning routine, I scanned the parking lot before getting out of my car. I saw Alice talking to a couple of other girls from her group. I saw Lauren and Jessica flirting with Eric and Tyler. I didn't see Mike. That could be a good thing…or really, really bad, but if I could just make it from my car to the inside of the school I would be okay.

I took a deep breath and stepped out of my car. I kept my head down, letting my hair hide my face, and walked toward the building, making sure to never make eye contact with anyone. Eye contact would just encourage them. I made it safely past the first line of parked cars. I quickly walked toward the second line of parked cars and passed it without any problems.

I must have been a fool to think I could make it past the third. As I stepped in front of the last row of cars, my foot caught on something in front of me, and I fell forward, my hands scraping the rough asphalt.

"Oops, better watch where you're walking there, Ednerd," Mike laughed, stepping out from behind Tyler Crowley's van and shaking his foot out in front of him. "Got anything good in here?" he asked as he grabbed my book bag and dumped my books onto the ground.

"Just books," I mumbled, looking down at my bleeding hands.

Mike and I had a bit of history. Mainly it involved him kicking my ass any chance he got while I cowered in the corner or on the ground, like I found myself doing this morning. As if the situation wasn't already bad enough, an angry voice suddenly echoed through the parking lot. " _Newton!_ "

_Great, my big brother has to save me again,_ I thought.

"Hey, Emmett. Just having a little fun, weren't we, Eddie?"

Emmett pushed Mike away. "Back off, Newton, or I'll be the one having a little fun when we get on the field today."

"Okay, man, sorry." Mike backed away, holding his hands up in front of him in surrender.

"You okay, Edward?" Emmett asked as he began picking up my books and papers.

"Oh, I'm just peachy. You?"

Emmett put his hand on my shoulder and sighed. "You know you can hang with Rose and me. I've told you that before."

"Emmett, do you know what's more embarrassing than all of this?" I asked, digging a small piece of gravel out of the cut on my palm. "Running to my big brother anytime somebody messes with me. It makes it worse. Besides, you're graduating this year, so what good does it do me next year, anyway?"

"I'm just saying, Edward…"

"Em, I know!" I snapped at him.

My throat began to tighten, and I could feel my emotions threatening to betray me just as the roar of a loud engine drew all attention away from me to the antique, rust-red pickup pulling into the parking lot. The truck pulled into an empty spot, the door creaked open, and out of the driver's seat emerged the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.

"Must be the new girl." Emmett shrugged and handed back my notebook. "Here, man, I gotta get to class. Just remember what I said, okay?"

"Okay, th…thanks," I said, not entirely comprehending his words. I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I wasn't the only one: the jaws of nearly every student in the parking lot dropped at the sight of her.

She wore a black Sex Pistols t-shirt with the sleeves cut off, and a pair of black Converse high tops peeked out from the bottoms of her dark jeans that were slit at the knees. She carried her book bag in one hand and a leather jacket in the other, and she walked with her head held high. I couldn't be positive because of the distance, but I think I even saw a lip ring.

My absolute favorite thing about her was her hair. It was the color of dark chocolate, cut short in the front and long in the back, and it was streaked with a rainbow of colors. Red. And blue. Green, purple, and yellow, too. As she walked to the building, a chorus of _Cherry Pie_ echoed in my head, which was strange, because I didn't even listen to that kind of music. She was stunning, and I knew I didn't stand a chance.

I watched her until she disappeared into the building and then tried to collect the rest of my books, my pride, and my jaw off the ground. As I made my way to the door, Alice's high-pitched, shrill laugh rang out across the parking lot. "Hey, Lauren! She's all yours."

^0-0^

The morning dragged on as I went through each class wondering if she'd be in it. With no sign of her before lunch, I sat at my usual table in the library and took out my notebook and my lunch. Normally, students weren't allowed to eat or drink in the library, but I think the librarian, Mrs. Miller, felt sorry for me. Every so often she would look up from her desk and shoot a pity smile at me. Yep, I was quite sure my life couldn't get any worse than it already was.

Trying to take my mind off my problems, I began jotting down my parking lot observations of the beautiful new girl. When the bell rang, I gathered up my belongings and headed to my next class. Three more periods meant three more chances to pass her in the hallway or maybe even share a class, but after the bell rang again and she wasn't in my fifth period class either, I began to lose hope. Who was I kidding, anyway; even if we did have a class together, she wouldn't notice me. _But you'd still get to look at her_. Oh great, now I was a stalker, too.

I sighed as I sat down at my biology table, put my book bag in the chair next to me, and nervously rubbed my scraped palms along the cool, black top of the table. I was the only one who didn't have a lab partner, and for that I was most grateful, but Newton was in this class, and he always managed to find some way to embarrass me.

Everyone filed in and took their seats as Mr. Banner began writing on the board and saying something about cell division. Then it happened. The one thing I had been waiting for all day. The door opened, and she walked in. I felt my heart speed up as she handed Mr. Banner a piece of paper, and he directed her toward an empty seat…the seat next to me.

I watched her walk toward me, and butterflies performed back flips in my stomach. As somebody who already had a very nervous stomach, this was not such a good thing. I was the proud owner of all fourteen seasons of South Park DVDs, and it was not until this moment that I finally understood why Stan threw up every time he kissed Wendy.

She stopped at my table, looked at me with her big brown eyes, and smiled while I kept my gaze on her. She remained standing, her smile fading to a strange, almost questioning look, before I realized why. Blushing, I quickly grabbed my book bag off the seat and dropped it on the floor so she could sit.

She sat down next to me, and I swear, a choir of angels sang out.

"Hi, I'm Bella Swan."

_Oh, God, she spoke to me. Say something back, dummy._ My mouth opened as if to speak, but nothing came out.

"Hey, Ednerd. Are you trying to catch flies over there?" Newton laughed.

Her head whipped toward Mike, and I quickly looked down at my textbook and hid behind my hair. I could feel my face growing even hotter, but luckily Mr. Banner started the class before I could embarrass myself anymore.

For the rest of the hour, Mr. Banner droned on about mitosis while I readied myself to speak to her. I prepared a whole speech in my mind. At the end of class I would introduce myself, welcome her to the lovely town of Forks, and tell her if she ever needed anything she could count on me.

I watched the hands on the clock tick closer and closer to two o'clock, and my heart sped up with each tick. _I can do this_ , I tried to reassure myself.

Finally, after what felt like the longest biology class of my life, the bell rang. While the other students raced out of class, I took a deep breath, fought back the nausea, and turned to face her seat.

"I'm Edward Cullen," I said with a smile, introducing myself to the empty chair next to me.

Yeah, I was a total loser.


	2. Chapter 2

_Her name is Noel  
I have a dream about her  
She rings my bell  
I got gym class in half an hour  
Oh how she rocks  
In Keds and tube socks  
But she doesn't know who I am  
And she doesn't give a damn about me_

_Cause I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby  
Yeah I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby  
Listen to Iron Maiden baby... with me_

_Man I feel like mold  
It's prom night and I am lonely.  
Lo and behold  
she's walking over to me.  
This must be fake  
My lip starts to shake  
How does she know who I am?  
And why does she give a damn about me?_

_I've got two tickets to Iron Maiden baby  
Come with me Friday, don't say maybe.  
I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby  
like you_

_Teenage Dirtbag - Wheatus_

\------------------------------------------------

 _Bella._ Her name meant beautiful, and that's exactly what she was. _Beautiful._

I said her name over and over, letting it roll off my tongue, as I drove home from school. The other drivers I passed probably thought I was having some sort of seizure or something, but I didn't care. Most of them already thought I was weird, anyway.

I pulled into the garage, grabbed a root beer out of the fridge, and ran straight up to my room. I was the only one home, so I didn't have to worry about making idle chitchat this afternoon, and I was quite happy about that because I had work to do.

I turned on my computer and logged onto Facebook. Surely she would have a Facebook page. I typed her name into the search bar, first Bella Swan, and then Isabella Swan, but nothing came up. Next, I tried MySpace. Nobody had a MySpace anymore, but I figured it couldn't hurt. Nothing came up there either. Then I tried Twitter. Nothing. _What is her aversion to social networking?_

Finally, I decided just to Google her. It was much creepier than Facebook stalking, but a man had to do what a man had to do. Besides, it wasn't like I was watching her through her bedroom window or sneaking into her house at night. I mean, really, what kind of creep does _that?_

Through Google I found her name listed on a couple of web pages from her high school in Phoenix. Apparently, she was in the Art club, and her classmates voted her "Most Likely to Lead a Mutiny," but that was about it. There was just nothing that revealed who she really was.

My stomach growled, and I realized I'd been internet-stalking Bella for over an hour.

I walked downstairs to grab a snack and found Rosalie Hale sitting at our kitchen counter, her school books spread in front of her.

"Hi, Edward." Rosalie, or Rose, was Emmett's girlfriend and the most beautiful girl in school. Well, she _had_ been the most beautiful until Bella showed up.

Rose was pretty nice and kind of shy. She always said hi to me in the halls and never really seemed to be ashamed to let other people see her talking to me. She hadn't always been that way, though. There was a time when she had been just like everybody else, but then at some point between her sophomore and junior year, she changed. She stopped hanging with her group of friends and began dating Emmett, and the two mostly just stuck with each other. In the mornings, during lunch, and in between classes, it was just the two of them. She seemed to suddenly become uncomfortable when any attention was on her and in large groups of people. I suppose anyone could change if they wanted to, but I always thought it was kind of strange how it happened so quickly.

"Hi, Rose. Where's Em?" I asked, grabbing a chocolate pudding cup out of the fridge.

"Upstairs, cleaning up from football practice." She smiled. "He really gave it to Newton today."

I groaned and quickly lost my appetite. If Emmett let Newton have it at practice, then I could be assured that Newton would let _me_ have it at school the next day. It was a vicious cycle that would only be broken if…well, let's face it, it would never be broken. I was cosmically destined to get my ass kicked during my entire four years of high school.

My mom arrived home from work and walked into the kitchen. "Hello, sweetheart," she said, kissing me on the cheek. "Hello, Rose." She smiled.

"Hello, Mrs. Cullen."

"Rose, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Esme? Mrs. Cullen is my mother-in-law," Mom said with a grimace. "No one wants to be reminded of her."

Rose smiled and looked down shyly. "Sorry, Esme."

"Don't be sorry, dear," Mom said, patting the top of Rose's hand. "You're like my own daughter. Will you be staying for dinner?"

"Yes, ma'am, if that's alright?"

Mom smiled. "Of course it is! Alice is eating at Jasper's tonight. It will be nice to have the company."

Here's the thing about my mom. The second somebody walked into our house, they became family to her. Alice and Emmett's friends all became her children too. Hell, she would take in someone off the streets if she knew it wouldn't give my father an aneurism. It was just the way she had always been – eternally caring. But she was also tough.

"Edward, what happened to your hand?" she ordered, flipping my palm up.

"Nothing, Mom," I said, trying to pull my hand back from her.

"This doesn't look like nothing," she said, gripping it even harder. "Come with me."

Mom dragged me by the arm to her bathroom and pulled out the ever familiar brown bottle from under the sink.

"Aw, Mom, come on! Not the peroxide," I begged. "It's just a scrape."

"It's going to get infected, Edward. Hand. Now!"

Reluctantly, I held my hand out over the sink, and she poured. The sting spread though the palm of my hand as the effervescent little white bubbles fizzed and laughed at me. If there was one thing I hated more than Newton, it was those damn bubbles.

"Ouch, son of a bitch!"

"Hey! You watch your mouth, young man. I did not raise you to speak that way."

"Sorry, Mom, but that hurt." I whined.

"Well, it looks like you've got a couple of puncture wounds. You better let your father look at this when he gets home tonight to make sure you don't need stitches."

Let my father look at it? Great. That was exactly what I didn't want to do. I wouldn't just be showing him a scrape on my hand; I would be showing him, once again, that I was a huge disappointment.

My father and I didn't exactly get along. He claimed I didn't live up to my potential. Emmett was the star athlete, Alice was his little princess, but me…well, I represented his failure. I got good grades and stuff, but I wasn't special. I didn't meet his social standards, I guess. Don't get me wrong; it's not that I ever felt he didn't love me or anything. It was just, well, he didn't love me as much.

He knew about my problems at school, but when my mom suggested they go talk to the principal, he'd flat out refused and forbid my mom from going on her own, claiming I had to learn to defend myself. But really, I knew it was because of his own insecurity – he was afraid of failing. We were far from it, but he wanted his family to be perfect, or at least appear perfect to outsiders. I'm not going to lie though; even knowing he had his own issues, it still hurt sometimes, not being good enough for my own dad.

Lucky for me, chances were slim he'd be home early. Over the past year, he'd been working overtime at Forks Hospital. He wanted to be chief of surgery and was trying to impress all the important people at the hospital so he would get the job when the current chief retired at the end of the year. Often, he'd be gone for days at a time, coming home and sleeping for a few hours before heading back. If sleep deprivation and never seeing your family were what made someone successful, then I, most certainly, could live without it.

I wiped the excess peroxide off on a hand towel and went back to my room. I figured I'd probably stalked Bella enough for one day and quickly signed on to WoW. I saw my friends Eleazar and Garrett were both online as well, so I put on my headset and hooked into Skype. Alas, more important things were afoot this evening. We had some werewolves to fight.

^0-0^

When I pulled into the parking lot the next morning I was relieved to see both Ben and Angela's cars were there. I also noticed Bella's truck was already there as well, though I didn't see her anywhere. I'd have to face my previous day's embarrassment eventually, but at least I had a good six and a half hours until that happened.

Alice nearly flew out of my car before I had even come to a full stop in my parking space. "You're welcome, harpy," I grumbled, and she turned around and shot me the finger. Ah, the love was overwhelming.

I made it safely inside the building without any incidents. Surprisingly, Newton was nowhere to be seen. Maybe he'd come down with the flu that had been going around, or even better, some painfully fatal disease that would leave him hemorrhaging out of every orifice of his body. Yeah, wouldn't that be nice. Anyway, I found Ben standing at his locker and made my way over.

"Hey, man! You still contagious?" I asked, approaching slowly.

"Nah, I think the worst is passed," he said, his voice nasal from his stuffy nose. "Still can't hardly breathe, but my mom made me come back today."

"Man, that sucks," I said, turning the dial to my locker. "So, uh, have you seen the new girl yet?"

"No. Why? Is she hot?"

"No. She's not _hot_." I was a bit miffed at his word choice. Bella deserved much more respect than that. "She's _beautiful,_ " I corrected him.

Ben smirked and shook his head. "Man, you got it bad," he said, slamming his locker shut.

"I do not."

"Edward, you rarely even notice girls, and if you do, you don't talk about them."

"Well, it's not gentlemanly, and anyway, look who's talking. Have you asked Angela out yet?"

"It's not like that with Angela and me, man."

I shook my head at his denial. Ben had had a crush on Angela since the sixth grade. He claimed they were "just friends," but everyone knew he was in love with her.

Ben and I were heading off toward class when we were met with our usual morning greeting in the hallway. "Hey, look. It's the geek squad!" Tyler shouted as he and Katie walked by, Alice and Jasper following close behind. Katie and Alice laughed while Jasper just looked away with a disgusted expression on his face. Unlike Rose, Jasper would make small talk with me when he was over at the house but didn't even acknowledge my existence in public. I'd grown used to it, but I definitely wouldn't consider him a friend.

Ben hardly even acknowledged the teasing. He'd always been a lot better at brushing it off than I was. I'd always wished it was as easy for me, but I guess being the one on the receiving end of the physical stuff left me angrier and a bit more scarred then he was.

The rest of the morning, I fidgeted in my seat through most of my classes. I was nervous but excited at the same time; it was a strange feeling I had never experienced before. Sixth period was quickly approaching, and I would get to see her again. Somehow I knew that if I could just talk to her, everything would be alright. But I still had to come up with something to say to her that wouldn't leave me looking like the major douche I was the day before. Maybe I could catch Emmett on his way through the cafeteria during lunch. The ladies loved Emmett; he'd know what I should say.

I was relieved when the lunch bell finally rang. For the first time in a long time, I was starving. I made my way to the cafeteria and joined Ben who was already sitting at our usual table. I scanned the room quickly, so as to not draw any unwanted attention to myself, but didn't see Emmett yet. I'd have to keep a look out. I pulled out my lunch bag and found a ham and cheese sandwich, a small bag of Fritos, a couple of homemade chocolate chip cookies, and not one, but two Capri Sun fruit punch pouches – my mom always made the best lunches!

"Okay, man. What's it gonna be today?" Ben asked.

I slowly peeled the saran wrap from around my sandwich as I considered my options. "Shotgun, new girl, Newton." That was easy.

"Man, you always trip Newton. He's good and zombified by now."

"And I always will," I said, biting into my sandwich. "Your turn."

Ben and I played this game almost every lunch. We'd name a weapon we'd use, one person we'd save, and one person we'd trip if Forks were ever to be struck by a zombie apocalypse. We felt this was a good way to stay prepared and increase our survival odds in case of such catastrophic events.

Ben thought for a moment. "Machete, Angela, Mr. Banner."

"And you always save Angela." I smirked.

Just as I took another bite of my sandwich, Ben sat straight up and turned red. That could only mean one thing…Angela was coming.

"Hi, guys!" Angela said, her voice coming from behind me, also sounding a bit nasally, but cheery as always.

"Hi, Angela," Ben said, shyly.

Angela stopped at the side of the table, and I looked up at her and _Oh. My. God._ I almost choked on my ham sandwich.

No.

No way.

It couldn't be.

Not now.

Not yet.

I wasn't ready. Son of a bitch, I wasn't ready!

"Guys, this is Bella. She's in my English class. She's going to sit with us, okay?"

Bella gave a small wave as Angela quickly took the seat next to Ben. Bella sat down next to me.

My jaw hit the table, and I quickly lost my appetite as the nausea crept back up. I tried to calm myself by taking deep breaths. I'd already made a horrible first impression in Biology the day before; I didn't think it would be very attractive if I suddenly blew chunks in front of her during lunch.

I could feel my nerves getting the best of me. My face felt hot…my entire body felt hot, and I was quite sure I was going to pass out at any second. I tried to turn my attention back to my lunch but the sleeve of her cut up, white t-shirt began to slip down the side of her shoulder, revealing the curve of her neck and a glimpse of the silky smooth skin that had been hidden beneath it.

Her neck…it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I wondered what it would be like to bury my face into the side of it. Would it smell good? _I bet it would. I bet it would smell like strawberries…No, stop it, Edward. This isn't gentlemanly!_ I silently scolded myself.

Nope. I definitely wasn't ready for this yet. But as if it wasn't already bad enough, she then proceeded to do something that, unbeknownst to her, proved to be the last straw that would change one, Edward Anthony Cullen, forever.

From deep in the midst of my lust-fueled panic attack, I watched from the corner of my eye as Bella pulled an apple and a bottle of lemonade out of her book bag and placed them on the table in front of her. She opened her lemonade and took a sip. Then she picked up the apple, brought it up to her lips, wrapped her mouth around the side, and sunk her teeth deep into it. A single drop of juice dripped down her chin, and she quickly wiped it away with the back of her hand.

Oh, how I longed to catch that drop with my tongue or have her mouth wrapped around me like that apple.

And with that, it was official. In a span of thirty seconds, Isabella Swan had single-handedly reduced me from an intelligent, comfortably introverted, zombie-killing master…to nothing more than a horny teenage boy.

Yep. I was totally effed.


	3. 3

_I've never known a girl like you before  
Now just like in a song from days of yore  
Here you come a knockin', knockin' at my door  
And I've never known a girl like you before_

_You give me just a taste so I want more and more  
Now my hands are bleeding and my knees are raw  
Now you've got me crawlin', crawlin' on the floor  
And I've never known a girl like you before_

_You've made me acknowledge the devil in me  
I hope to God I'm talkin' metaphorically  
Hope that I'm talkin' allegorically  
Know that I'm talkin' about the way I feel  
And I've never known a girl like you before_

_A Girl Like You - Edwyn Collins_

\------------------------------------------------

I was pretty sure I was dead. Pretty sure because I could hear the angels singing again.

"Hey, Mr. Mc-Stares-a-Lot."

And the sound was heavenly.

" _Helloooo._ "

But then, a sharp pain shot through my arm, and I wondered if I might have not made it to heaven after all. I began to hear the sound of voices echoing around me, and then another pain pierced through my shoulder. That's when I realized I wasn't in heaven after all; I was in hell, and hell was a high school cafeteria.

I glanced across the table to see Ben staring at me, his fist clenched, ready to hit me again. "Crap. What the hell was that for?" I asked, rubbing my arm.

"Man, you were gone!" Ben laughed.

"Well, I see you can speak."

I turned to the voice next to me. She was talking to me again. I had to say something back. "Uh…" Yeah, that was impressive.

"Mind telling me why you were staring at me?"

"It…I…um…" My head was going to explode at any second, and Ben, the traitor, was laughing at me.

A shock of blue hair fell in her face, and I wanted to reach over and brush it away for her. I wanted to push it behind her ear. I wanted to run my fingers through it to find out what an angel's hair felt like. But she shook it back in place before I could move. It was probably a good thing. I probably would have ended up poking her in the eye or something.

"Never mind. You gonna eat that?" she asked, pointing to my half-eaten sandwich.

I hesitantly pulled my gaze off of her and looked down at what was once an appetizing ham and cheese sandwich. Now, even just the thought of it left me fighting back the nausea that had been building up in my stomach.

"You're not sick, are you? You're looking a bit green there. I don't want whatever you got."

I shook my head.

"Oh, well, then, can I have it? All I got is this apple. I'm fucking starving!"

She wanted my sandwich? I'd given my lunch to people before, but this was the first time anybody ever asked first. I certainly couldn't eat it anymore, so I pushed it over to her and she quickly picked it up and took a bite.

"Mmm, so good. Mayonnaise. My mom always made my sandwiches with Miracle Whip. Have you ever had Miracle Whip? It's just not right." Then she looked over, smiled at me, and began eyeing my chocolate chip cookies. I pushed the bag over to her and watched as she grabbed one and put it up to her lips. As much as I longed to continue watching her eat, I had to turn away. I didn't think I could handle another apple incident so soon. But when I looked in front of me, I was instantly met with Ben staring straight at me, a knowing smirk across his face. I answered his smirk with my "evil eye," and he turned away from me. He was still smirking though.

Thank God for Angela. She must have noticed my discomfort because she quickly drew the attention away from me. "I like your t-shirt," she said. "Siouxsie and the Banshees?"

"Oh, thanks." Bella looked down at her shirt, and brushed a cookie crumb off of her chest. I may or may not have whimpered a bit when she did that. "Yeah, they're pretty awesome."

"Do you have a lot of band t-shirts?" Angela asked.

Bella nodded. "I've got a lot, close to a hundred, I think."

"Where do you get them?" Ben asked, his attention now focused entirely on the conversation, and that made me happy because at least he wasn't punching me anymore.

"Mostly on the internet. A lot were gifts too." Bella smiled. "My crazy mom can't go into a music store without buying me one."

"Uh, did that hurt?" Ben rubbed his finger between his chin and his lip in reference to Bella's lip ring.

Bella shook her head and the blue segment of hair fell back into her face, and she pushed it to the side. "Not until about a week after I got it done. One night, it just started throbbing all of a sudden, and when I woke up the next morning, it was all infected and full of puss."

Ben and Angela responded with simultaneous "Oh cools" and "Ewws," while my stomach just about turned inside out.

"Yeah, it was pretty gross. But then it started swelling, and for about a week, I looked like I had elephantiasis of the bottom lip. That's what I get for letting my friend, Sam, practice for his piercing license on me, I guess." She shrugged. "Anyway, it had to be lanced and drained, and the doctor said if I'd waited any longer I could have died from blood poisoning. It was totally crazy."

"Oh, wow! Was your mom real mad?"

"Nah, my mom's a total hippie. She doesn't care what I do. My dad, on the other hand, hates it. He's so anal about rules and shit. He's such a cop." Bella laughed, and I got the feeling she enjoyed annoying her dad. I wondered if having a dad that was a cop was harder than having a dad that was a doctor, if he wasn't home a lot, if she had a lot of stupid rules she had to follow, and if he paid attention to her when he was home.

The end of lunch bell rang, and I realized I'd just sat there the entire time like an idiot, not saying a word. Bella probably thought I was some kind of creepy future serial killer or something by the way I stared and drooled over her. God knows, I was certainly beginning to fit the profile.

As I walked out of the cafeteria though, I figured the hard part was over. She seemed not to be completely repulsed by me. I didn't think she would have eaten my lunch if she had been. So the only thing I had left to do was talk to her, and by the time biology rolled around, I was feeling pretty confident in my ability to do so. Maybe I didn't actually need Emmett's help after all. I was cool, calm, and collected.

But when she walked into class and sat down next to me and smiled that smile, I instantly reverted back to the mute idiot I was.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi," I said back…

Only I didn't.

I grunted.

I instantly slid as far down in my seat as I could get and prayed for anything that could make this nightmare be over. Possible scenarios began playing out in my mind. How great would it be if I was just sitting in class, taking notes, and the overhead light fell from the ceiling and landed on the top of my head, killing me instantly? "I don't know what happened," Banner would say. "It was some kind of freak accident. There's just no scientific explanation for why it fell." Or if a rogue Russian missile set its target on me and crashed through the window, taking me out with it. "It was as if the missile knew something we didn't," the Russians would say. "Perhaps he was more dangerous than he appeared." Or if a beam from a UFO came through the roof and pulled me up into its ship. "You fit in more with us, anyway," the aliens would say. Hell, I'd freely let an alien probe any part of my body it wanted if it meant I could leave Forks forever. It'd be a lot less painful.

I grudgingly pulled my thoughts back to the present as Banner began to drone on about cells for the eighty gazillionth time, but my attention was quickly drawn to Bella's hand as she took notes. I watched her hand as it swirled the pen along the paper. Then she paused for a moment, and I quickly looked away, afraid she had caught me staring at her again. But she just flexed her wrist and picked up where she left off. I tried to fight the urge to keep watching her, but she was just too hard to resist, so this time I leaned forward against the table, resting the side of my head on my left hand, and let my hair hide the side of my face as I peered at her through the strands.

I watched her like that as she drew letters and loops and doodles and squiggly lines until the bell rang. I reached down to pick my book bag up off the floor, and when I turned back around, she was looking at me.

"Well, that was boring as balls. Thank God I have P.E. next. At least I'll get to take out my frustration on a volleyball and maybe a couple of catty, blonde bitches if I aim just right." Bella smiled, and I sort of half-laughed, half-grunted at her joke. We looked at each other for a moment before she spoke again. "So, your eyes are kind of beautiful. Anyone ever tell you that?"

I shook my head because it was true. No one had, well, no one other than my mom.

"Well, they are. Anyway, I gotta get to class." She stood up and started toward the door.

And then it happened.

I swear, I don't know where it came from, but all of a sudden, words started coming out of my mouth. "Yesterday, you were wearing a Sex Pistols t-shirt."

Yes! I actually spoke to her. But then she kept looking at me like she was waiting for me to say something else, and I realized I _had_ nothing else. I looked down as my face turned a shade of red that I was positive was redder than the red in her hair.

Bella sighed and patted my hand. "It's okay, Edward. You just keep working on that a bit. See you tomorrow."

She turned away from me and I stood up and began packing my things into my book bag, once again silently cursing myself. Why did I have to say _that_ _?_ Why couldn't I have said it two hours earlier when it would have been relevant? There was just no denying it. I was an idiot, and my missile scenario was looking more and more appealing by the second.

But suddenly Bella turned around and walked back to me. "You know, you should really stop hiding behind your hair," she said, reaching up and pushing it behind my ears, her fingertips brushing lightly across my face and ears, inciting a very curious tingling sensation to spread throughout my body. "I might want to stare at you during class, too, and I can't do that when your hair is in the way." And with that, she winked and walked out of the classroom.

Completely unprepared for the physical, er, "reaction" that followed, I headed off to my final class of the day as quickly as possible, maneuvering through the crowded hallway with my head down, and making sure I kept my notebook held low and secure in front of me.

^0-0^

Alice was standing at my car when I walked out into the parking lot after seventh period. She'd been either going to Jasper's or getting a ride home from him after school for the past few weeks, so her sudden need for a ride home from me was surprising.

"What's wrong, Alice? No Jasper today?" I rounded the front of my car and got in, slamming the door.

"I don't have to spend every day after school with him," she snapped. "And why the temper? What's wrong with _you?_ "

I looked at her and smirked. "Do you really care?"

She held a finger up to her chin and pretended to think for a moment. "Nope. Not really."

I didn't think she did, but that wasn't my concern anyway. As I pulled out of the parking lot, I contemplated what I had to do to actually be able to speak to Bella, not just random words and noises, but a full, comprehensive, and relevant sentence. Something that normal people would say in an actual conversation.

The drive home was quiet as I ruminated my existence and Alice made love to her reflection in the visor mirror. I wondered how Jasper could stand being with a girl who was obviously more in love with herself than she was him. I mean, what the hell did they talk about when it was just the two of them? Did Jasper even talk at all? Knowing Alice, he probably couldn't get a word in if he tried.

When we pulled into the driveway, Emmett's car was there. I swallowed my pride, or what was left of it at that point, and followed Alice into the house. She stormed up the stairs to her room and slammed her door, and I headed for the kitchen where I found Emmett scarfing down a bowl of cereal.

"Hey, no football practice today?"

He shoveled a spoonful of Cap'n Crunch into his mouth before answering. "Nope. Coach cancelled it. Half the team's out with the flu."

I paced around the kitchen as I tried to dig up the courage to just ask him. But every time I tried, I froze up and would say something else. "Oh, uh, is mom home?"

"Not yet." Emmett stopped eating and looked up at me from his bowl. "What's up, man? You're looking mighty pensive there."

This was it, time to embarrass the hell out of myself, all in the name of a girl. I focused all of my concentration on my hand and picked at the scab that was beginning to form on my palm, trying to avoid all eye contact as I asked my big brother how to talk to a girl. "I, er…"

"What is it, Edward? Was somebody messing with you today?" he asked concerned, standing straight up from the counter stool. "Who was it? Give me his name, and I'll kick his ass!"

"What? No. Calm down, Em. It's not that. It's…it's a girl."

"A _girl_ was messing with you? Oh, no, Edward. I can't kick a girl's ass," Emmett said, shaking his head and backing away slightly.

I knew he meant well, but I was getting more and more frustrated by the second. This was not the way I had planned this conversation to go. "No, Em. Nobody was messing with me." I slammed my hands down on the counter, and he finally seemed to believe me.

"Oh," he replied, a sigh of relief escaping him as he sat back down on the stool. "Well, what is it then?"

"I need your help. I need you to teach me how to talk to a girl."

Emmett's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head, and his mouth dropped open before turning upward into his usual shit-eating grin. It was exactly the reaction I was dreading. "Edward, my _man!_ " He reached across the counter and punched me in the shoulder. "I always knew you had it in you. So, who is she?"

I sighed. God, this was horrific. "Bella."

" _Bella? The one with the hair!_ _Hard-core, Edward!_ " He reached across the counter and punched me again.

"Ouch. Would you stop doing _that_?" What was with everyone punching me? I rubbed my shoulder and could feel the bruise forming already.

"Oh, sorry, man. Well, what do you need me to help you with? You can talk to girls. You talk to Rose just fine."

"Well, yeah, but Rose isn't, I mean, she _is_ but she isn't…um…" I squirmed where I stood. I was growing even more uncomfortable by the second and now trying to explain to my brother what my feelings were toward his girlfriend was just making it worse.

"You mean she doesn't tickle your pickle like Bella does."

" _Oh, my God, no, Emmett!_ And I wouldn't describe it in that way, anyway. It's not gentlemanly."

Emmett snorted. "Look, man, gentlemanly or not, that's exactly what it is. You're a dude, and dudes are horny. Hold back all you want, but eventually, you're going to have to tap someone, and if you want that someone to be Bella, you're gonna have to stop worrying about being gentlemanly and go after what you want before it's too late and some other dude gets her."

I couldn't believe I was hearing this coming out of my brother's mouth. He was always very respectful of Rosalie. Gentlemanly, even. I wondered if she knew he talked like this when she wasn't around, so I asked, "Does Rose know you talk like this when she isn't around?"

With that question, Emmett's shit-eating grin reappeared. "I love Rosalie and would never treat her with any kind of disrespect. She's a beautiful, kind, and strong woman who's already had to put up with enough crap." His eyes lit up as he talked about her, and it was true. Anybody who ever saw them together could see how obvious it was that he loved her. "But Edward, this conversation isn't about me and Rose. It's about you and Bella, which is a completely different situation, and for it to work out, you're going to have to let go of this preconceived notion of what a gentleman is. I hate to be so blunt with you, man, but there's a difference between a gentleman and a wuss. Gentlemen go after what they want. Wusses stand around and watch everyone else get what they want. And believe it or not, you're not a wuss. I know you enough to know you're way stronger than you think. Just talk to her. What's the worst that could happen?" He shrugged and shoveled another spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

What's the worst that could happen? I could think of an entire list of things, like my usual saying something really stupid and looking like a fool, or having another "reaction" like I had after science class in front of her, or even Mike Newton showing up mid-conversation and proving to Bella exactly how weak I was. I leaned my head back against the cabinets behind me and sighed. The worst that could happen always happened to me.

Just then, a door slammed on the second floor, and Alice stomped back down the stairs, stopping to look at Emmett and I before walking to the refrigerator, grabbing a bottle of water, and chugging it down like she'd just spent a day lost in the desert. Emmett and I watched and waited for her to stomp back up to her room, but she just stood there staring at us as we stared right back at her. I couldn't help but notice her eyes were a little red.

Emmett finally broke the awkward silence. "Why are _you_ home?"

"What?"

"Why are you home, Alice? Shouldn't you be off with Jasper doing whatever it is you and Jasper do?"

Alice crossed her arms over her chest and her face turned pink. I braced myself. That's usually what happened right before she unleashed the harpy. "For your information, _Emmett_ , I don't have to spend every waking hour of my life with Jasper. I have my own life, too, you know."

Emmett cocked his head to the side and squinted. "Have you been crying?"

"No." Alice huffed.

"Well, I just wondered because your eyes are looking a little bloodshot. You haven't been smoking the wacky weed again, have you?" Emmett teased. "Mom said she'd ground you for the rest of your life if she caught you doing that again. Whaddya say, Edward? Should we let Mom know?"

I snorted and the harpy glared at me.

"Screw you. What the hell are _you_ doing down here, anyway. Shouldn't you be locked in your room, playing your dweeb game?"

"Well, for _your_ information, _Alice_ , Emmett and I were having a personal conversation before you came in here and disturbed us. And it's a free country, you know. I can be wherever I want."

"Whatever. I'd thought maybe I could spend some good quality time with my brothers, but obviously I was wrong. This is so lame." She turned out of the kitchen and stomped back up the stairs.

Emmett and I looked back at each other, and he shook his head. "Weird."

Weird was right. Since when did Alice care about quality time? There was definitely something off with her, and if we'd had a good relationship, I would have followed her up to her room and asked her what was wrong. But our relationship sucked, and I had bigger things on my mind.

I walked up to my room and collapsed on my bed. I didn't even have the strength to turn on my computer. I simply wished to crawl into a hole and disappear from the world. It shouldn't have been this hard. Guys talked to girls they liked all the time, and they didn't sound like blithering idiots when they did. Not me though. Idiot was quickly becoming my middle name, and I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to talk to Bella.

^0-0^

Even after my conversation with Emmett the previous day, I wasn't any more confident about talking to Bella. She was so beautiful; why would she even bother with me? I just had to accept the fact that she wouldn't and let her go. She'd find somebody who could make her happy, somebody who could hold a conversation with her, somebody who could be a friend to her. That somebody wasn't me. I had succumbed to my own defeat. Emmett was wrong. I _was_ a wuss.

School went by in a blurry haze that morning. I felt like I was just kind of there, making my body go through the motions while my mind was lost in a world of self-loathing. I'd numbed myself to everyone around me. Even the usual parking lot and hallway taunts seemed to not matter. If Newton had been there, I was pretty sure I wouldn't even have felt his fists.

I headed for the library during lunch. I didn't want to talk to anybody or play stupid zombie games. And I certainly didn't want to see Bella. I just wanted to hide, preferably forever.

By the time sixth period came along, my depression was so deep that my usual nerves and insecurities when it came to Bella had completely disappeared. She was just my lab partner, nothing more. She would never be.

I sat down at our table, pulled out my books, and waited for class to start.

Bella soon came in and sat down. "You weren't at lunch."

I shook my head.

"Are you okay? We were worried about you."

I sighed but stared straight ahead. "Just had some stuff I had to work on in the library."

"Oh. Well, are you going to be there tomorrow?"

"I have no idea. Guess we'll all find out tomorrow." I could see her glaring at me from the corner of my eye, and I turned my head in the opposite direction, staring out the window through most of the class.

When it was over, Bella stood next to our table and looked at me, waiting for me to say something, I presumed. But I just gathered up my things and brushed past her. I wasn't trying to be rude, but it was just better that way.

At the end of the day, I walked out to my car. Alice wasn't there, so I figured she must have worked out whatever her weirdness was with Jasper. As I walked to the back of the parking lot and the other cars pulled out of the lot, I could hear the sound of an engine struggling to turn over. I couldn't help but be grateful that for once, I wasn't the one with the bad luck. I got in my car and made it halfway through the lot when I saw that the hood of Bella's truck was propped open and she was leaning over the engine.

I drove past her, refusing to look back or turn around. She didn't need my help. Besides, I knew nothing about cars anyway. What good would I be? But as I turned out of the parking lot, I saw her slam the hood shut and lean up against the side of the truck with her arms crossed over her chest. I wondered if she had anybody she could call for a ride. Her dad was a cop, so he'd know what to do if she called. But what if he was at work, investigating a murder, or the mob, or a Mexican drug cartel and couldn't get to her in a long time? I couldn't just leave her stranded in the cold, could I, even if she did make me turn into the village idiot?

After debating with myself for all of two seconds, my conscience won, and I made a U-turn back into the school parking lot. I approached her slowly and rolled down my window. "Do you need a ride?" I asked, but it barely came out as a whisper.

" _What?_ "

"Do you need a ride?" I repeated, and this time it came out at an audible decibel level.

"Looks like it," she said, but she didn't look at me or move from her position against the truck.

"Uh, well, I could, uh, give you a ride, if you want."

" _Really?_ " she snapped at me. "Because after earlier, I wasn't sure you wanted to be around me."

What? She thought I didn't want to be around her? That was ridiculous. How could a beautiful creature like her think somebody wouldn't want to be around her? But then I realized my own behavior had probably made her think that. I had taken my own insecurities out on her. I had pushed her away when she was just trying to be nice to me, and all I ended up doing was hurting her feelings. I had done exactly the same thing everyone else always did to me. Oh, why was I always such an idiot? "I'm sorry. I…it's…er…I didn't mean to…I'm an idiot. I'm not used to people _wanting_ to talk to me."

She looked at me with a disbelieving smirk, and I answered her with an expression that said "I'm really sorry." Or at least I hoped it said that. Of course with my luck, it probably actually said "I'm really constipated" or something of the sort. Anyway, after what seemed like forever, I saw her face soften and her stance relax. She opened the door of her truck, grabbed her book bag off the seat, and walked over to the passenger side of my car. She pulled the handle but stood there for a second before I realized the door was locked. I felt the blush begin to creep in but quickly tried to put it out of my mind and unlocked the door for her.

She climbed in and closed the door, and the aroma of chocolate and mint filled my car as she pulled a tube of lip balm out of her pocket and swiped it across her lips.

But I couldn't let myself focus on any of that. I had to do whatever it took to be normal for once. I took a deep breath to calm myself before speaking. "Where to?"

"Just take the main road through town, and I'll guide you from there."

"Okay," I said, but as I put the car into drive and pulled out of the parking lot, I could feel normal slipping away. I gripped the steering wheel harder and harder, trying to will my body to calm down but the more I tried, the worse it got. Before I knew what was happening, I slammed on the brakes, causing both Bella and I to fly forward before we were pushed back into our seats by our seatbelts. I began choking for air.

Bella shrieked in surprise. " _Edward? What's wrong? Are you okay?_ "

My entire body started shaking as the thought of what was actually happening began to take over my mind.

Bella Swan was in my car.

I was giving her a ride home from school.

And I had just completely forgotten how to drive.


	4. Chapter 4

_I don't care if Monday's blue  
Tuesday's grey and Wednesday too  
Thursday i don't care about you  
It's Friday I'm in love_

_Monday you can fall apart  
Tuesday Wednesday break my heart  
Thursday doesn't even start  
It's Friday I'm in love_

_Saturday wait  
And Sunday always comes too late  
But Friday never hesitate..._

_I don't care if Monday's black  
Tuesday Wednesday heart attack  
Thursday never looking back  
It's Friday I'm in love_

_Monday you can hold your head  
Tuesday Wednesday stay in bed  
Or Thursday watch the walls instead  
It's Friday I'm in love_

_Saturday wait  
And Sunday always comes too late  
But Friday never hesitate..._

_Dressed up to the eyes  
It's a wonderful surprise  
To see your shoes and your spirits rise  
Throwing out your frown  
And just smiling at the sound  
And as sleek as a shriek  
Spinning round and round  
Always take a big bite  
It's such a gorgeous sight  
To see you in the middle of the night  
You can never get enough  
Enough of this stuff  
It's Friday  
I'm in love_

_Friday I'm in Love - The Cure_

^0-0^

A line of cars had gathered behind me, and they were honking. This only increased my panic attack that had seemingly come out of nowhere. I had been doing so well up until then. I had actually spoken to Bella like a normal human being. I had been clear and confident, but now…

"Edward?"

I gripped the steering wheel tighter and tighter to keep my hands from shaking. I couldn't believe it. She was in my car, and I was taking her home. A girl. And not just any girl, but the most beautiful girl in the world. I had to do something. I had to come to my senses. I had to find normal again. _Holy shit, say something, douche nozzle._

"Deer!" Yeah, that'd work.

"What?"

"Didn't you see it? It was humongous, like an elk…or something. Ran across the road," I said, lying. Now I was a liar.

"Really? I didn't see anything." Bella leaned forward and looked into the trees on both sides of the road before sitting back in her seat and shrugging her shoulders. "Guess I missed it. You better go. People are honking at us."

I nodded and slowly began to regain my memory of how to operate a motor vehicle. I moved my foot back over to the gas pedal and slowly pulled off down the road. But I must have had some left over adrenaline or something because my entire leg kept shaking, and the harder I pushed the gas pedal, the more it shook. I hoped to God she didn't notice, but as I picked up speed, I was sure I could feel the car jerk with each tremor.

Aside from the shaking leg and invisible deer, the rest of the drive went pretty well. It was only ten minutes from the school to her house. Part of me was grateful for that, less time for me to continue to make a fool out of myself, but the other part of me wished it was longer, so I could be near her. The first couple of minutes were quiet, but she soon broke the awkward silence that was building around us.

"So, how long have you lived in Forks?" she asked.

 _Deep breaths, you can do this._ "Um, well, I was born here. My parents are both from Forks, too. What about you? Where are you from?"

"I was actually born in Forks, too, but my parents split when I was a baby, and my mom brought me to Phoenix with her. I used to come and visit Charlie in the summers, though."

"Charlie?"

"My dad."

"Oh. Why do you call him by his first name?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I just always have. I guess it's because of Renee, my mom. She always wanted me to call her by her first name. She likes to act more like friends than mother and daughter. Don't get me wrong; we have a great relationship. She's just a hippie."

"So, why did you move back then? It's got to be tough leaving your friends when you only have a year and a half until graduation."

"Renee decided to sell the house. She met a new boyfriend, Phil, and he convinced her to move to a commune."

"Wait, what? A commune? Like with a bunch of other people, who, like, raise goats, and live in mud huts and stuff?" Her mother definitely sounded…interesting.

"Yep! Cooperative, sustainable living. Like I said, she's a hippie. If it works for her, then great, but there's no way I'm stepping foot in an outhouse. You thought I was joking about her being a hippie, didn't you?" Bella smiled. "Nobody ever believes me when I say that."

Before I'd realized it, we'd pulled up to an older-looking, white house. It was two stories, and a large tree sat on the left side of it. It was very different than what I was used to, but I guessed smaller families didn't really need as much space as bigger families did.

"Well, this is it," she said.

I put the car in park and turned to her. A question had been stirring in my mind since earlier in our conversation. "How come I never saw you?"

"What?"

"You said you used to visit in the summer. This is a small town. How come I never saw you around?"

She shrugged her shoulders and stuck out her bottom lip. It looked so shiny and smooth. I wondered what it would feel like if I…

"I don't know. I went into town with Charlie a lot. Maybe you did and you just don't remember."

I peeled my eyes off of her shiny lip and up to her eyes. "No. I would have remembered you." I was sure of it.

She smiled, grabbed her bag from in front of her, and climbed out of the car. "Thanks for the ride, Edward."

She was just about to close the door when I stopped her. " _Wait!_ Do you need a ride in the morning?"

"Oh, yeah, I guess I do. Charlie goes to work really early."

"Okay. I'll pick you up in the morning then."

"Okay. Thanks." She smiled and gave me a small wave before closing the door and walking up to her front door. Once she got it unlocked, she turned and waved again before going inside and closing the door behind her.

I sat in her driveway for a minute, replaying everything that had just happened over and over in my mind. For a second, I wasn't even sure I was awake and knew that at any moment I would wake up from this really awesome dream. That's what usually happened with good dreams. You'd get to the best part, and then your alarm clock would go off and violently thrust you back into the monotonous disappointment that was real life.

But this time, my alarm clock never went off.

Figuring I'd better go before one of the neighbors got suspicious about why the Cullen creep was hanging out in her driveway, I pulled away, unable to stop smiling. The other drivers I passed probably thought I was high or something, which for the record, I have never been, but I imagined this was what it might feel like.

The euphoria lasted the entire way home, right up until I pulled into the driveway and saw my dad's car in the garage. Nothing like the sight of a shiny, black Mercedes to bring me crashing down.

I walked into the house, praying he was asleep and that I would at least get a couple hours to prepare myself for what would surely be an evening of constant nagging and badgering about whatever it was I was doing wrong now.

But of course, nothing was ever that easy, and as I tiptoed my way upstairs to hide out in my room, he called to me.

"Son."

 _Aww, eff._ I sighed and stopped in the doorway of his study. "Hi, Dad."

He got up from his desk and walked over to me. From where he stood, the light reflecting off of his hair could have probably blinded someone, and he reminded me of Max Headroom the way it was all slicked back. For Halloween one year, I'd actually saved an old computer monitor and busted through the bottom of it so he could stick his head through.

He didn't find it funny.

His real hair was actually the same color as mine, but he began bleaching it a few years back when he started to go gray. I never really understood why he bleached it. I always thought people dyed their hair dark when they got gray. But then one day I overheard Mom telling her book club friends how she thought it was sexy. That's not something you ever want to hear your mom say. I couldn't get that thought out of my head for days.

"Your mother said you hurt your hand the other day. Let me take a look."

"It's okay, Dad. It's just a scratch."

"Edward, let me see it," he ordered, and I reluctantly stuck my hand out in front of him.

"It's almost healed, see."

"I do see. You should have come by the hospital when it happened. This is a deep wound, but it's too late to do anything about it now. You'll have a scar. How did you do this?"

"I tripped."

"You tripped?" he asked skeptically.

"Yes, I tripped. I was walking through the parking lot, and I tripped." Technically, it was the truth. I only lied to pretty girls about invisible deer.

He stared at me for a moment, completely disbelieving my explanation before finally letting go of my hand. "We're having a family dinner tonight, Edward. I've asked Alice and Emmett to be here. I expect you to be here as well."

Really? Had he forgotten who he was talking to? Where the hell else would I be? "I'll be sure to clear my schedule," I mumbled under my breath as I headed toward my room and shut the door.

A family dinner. Craptastic. The last family dinner consisted of me listening to how great Alice and Emmett were and how much of a failure I was. This one would be no different, I was sure. I let out a long, loud sigh and sat down at my computer. At least I could escape for a couple hours before I had to deal with the torture.

After explaining to Eleazer and Garrett why I had been MIA for a couple days, though not getting into too much detail about it, I quickly immersed myself in our game and lost track of time until I heard a knock.

"Edward, dinner's ready," Mom said on the other side of my door.

I groaned and hesitantly headed downstairs to my torture chamber. I sat down at our dining room table and found that we were eating my least favorite meal – meatloaf, baked potatoes, and fresh broccoli. Of course, the only reason we were having this particular meal was because it was my dad's favorite. I reached for the ketchup bottle and doused my entire plate in it because it was the only way I could ever stand to swallow the stuff.

Mom made her way to her seat but stopped behind me and leaned in close to my ear. "Just eat what you can. I'll make you some grilled cheese a little later," she whispered as she rubbed my arm. I couldn't help but feel slightly better after that. But then Dad and Alice both sat down, and Alice started yapping at him about which colleges she was thinking about applying to, and I immediately wanted to stab myself in the eye with my fork.

Finally, Emmett came barreling into the dining room, accidentally knocking into the china cabinet and rattling the dishes inside of it. He sat down in the chair next to me and nudged me with his elbow. " _So?_ " he whispered.

"So, what?" I whispered back, though I knew full well what he was alluding to.

"Don't try to be all coy with me, little brother. I know what happened after school today."

Emmett and his damn shit-eating grin. I definitely did not want to talk about this now and quickly tried to change the subject. "Coy? What's that, another one of your SAT words?" Emmett, never wanting to seem like the stereotypical dumb jock, had decided last year that he would start actually using the words listed in the SAT vocabulary section in regular conversation. I tried to convince him that it was pretentious to use big words around people who didn't use big words themselves, but he just grabbed the dictionary, looked up "pretentious," and added it to his list.

He winked. "You know it."

Just then, Dad cleared his throat. "Edward, mind telling the rest of us what's so interesting it couldn't wait until after dinner?"

And thus, it began.

"We were just talking about SAT stuff," Emmett jumped in before I could say anything.

"Really? Edward, have you finally signed up for the test?"

I looked down at my plate. "No, Dad." _Thanks, Emmett._

"Well, what exactly is it you're waiting for? Alice has already taken it."

Alice smirked, held up two fingers, and wiggled them at me, rubbing it in that she'd actually taken it twice because the 1500 she got on it the first time wasn't good enough for her. I would've been happy with it.

"I think it's time you got yourself in gear and really started thinking about your future. Have you given any thought to what you want to do with your life?"

I sighed and looked down at my meatloaf, repeatedly stabbing it with my fork.

"What about school clubs? They'd look great on your college applications," Dad continued.

Then I started stabbing into the rest of my food. The cute little broccoli trees weren't even safe from my wrath.

"Debate? Student government? Key Club?"

The ketchup started to smear all of over my plate, and soon, my dinner looked like a bloodbath.

"Edward, are you even listening to me?"

Emmett kicked me under the table to get my attention, and I looked up at Dad. He and Alice were both glaring at me, waiting for my answer. Just then, Mom cleared her throat.

"Carlisle, dear, how's everything at the hospital? Any word on the surgery position yet?" Mom asked, blatantly trying to change the subject. Though he knew what she was doing, Dad turned away from me and looked at Mom.

"Not yet. They're still looking over candidates from outside of the state. It's simply a hiring procedure required by law. I have no doubt I'm at the top of their list."

"Well, that's wonderful, dear. Hopefully all of your time spent away from your family will have been worth it," she said, giving him a glare that I swear could have shot daggers.

Dad seemed to notice, too, and after that, the rest of dinner went by without a word from anyone.

I felt kind of guilty for being the cause of my parents' fight, so after everyone had gone back upstairs, I helped Mom clean up the kitchen. Once we had gotten the dishwasher loaded and the pans were scrubbed and put away, she turned to me and smiled. "So, would you like that grilled cheese now?"

"Nah, I'm not really that hungry. Thanks, though."

She nodded but walked up to me and put her hands on my shoulders. " _You_ don't worry about him. You'll figure it all out when you're ready, and you'll do whatever it is that makes you happy," she said, reaching up and brushing my hair behind my ears. "The most important thing is that you are happy."

I don't know how, but Mom always knew how to make me feel better. I smiled and she pulled my head down to her and kissed my forehead. "Thank you for your help in the kitchen. Now, go do your homework."

"Aww, Mom! I thought we were friends!" I whined.

"Edward. Go!" she ordered, pointing up at the stairs.

I did what I was told and went up to my room, but my mind was too preoccupied with other things, mostly Bella, to focus on homework. I'd never felt this way about a girl before. Sure, I'd had minor crushes on a few girls, and I'd thought a few more were cute. But they'd never been remotely interested in me, so I never really paid much attention to them otherwise. I once thought Angela was sort of cute, but as soon as I found out that Ben really liked her, I put that thought behind me as well. My feelings for Bella were something totally new for me, and for the first time in a long time, I was actually excited about something.

But I was nervous, too. What if she didn't feel the same about me? She barely knew me, and I wasn't exactly the nicest person to her at first. What if I'd already screwed up? I'd have to regain her trust somehow, convince her that I really wasn't an asshole.

I sprawled across my bed and stared up at the ceiling. My stomach was an absolute wreck, but this time, instead of wanting to burst their way through me "Alien" style, the butterflies seemed to be doing little happy dances in there.

It was pretty late before I finally fell asleep that night. My mind kept racing, and I kept imagining all of the different possible scenarios I could find myself in at school the next day. Most were bad, as always, but then some were kind of good, too. Of course, those involved Bella in some way. Before I knew it, the menacing, anxiety-inducing face of Mike Newton had all but disappeared from my mind, and Bella Swan stared back at me, her beautiful, swirling brown eyes hypnotizing me into a dreamless sleep.

^0-0^

The next morning, I woke up extra early and snuck out of the house before Alice could notice I was leaving without her. I certainly didn't want her tagging along when I picked up Bella, and as far as I was concerned, I was done playing her chauffeur, anyway.

I pulled up in front of Bella's house and noticed her truck was parked in the driveway. I started to worry that she didn't need a ride anymore, but then she ran out of the house and jumped in my car.

"Hi." She smiled at me. I felt a little tingly.

"Hi. Got your truck back?"

"More like towed back, but it's not going anywhere for a while. We can't really afford to get it fixed right now."

"Oh. That sucks," I said, though I was secretly happy about it because it meant that I might be able to give her a ride to and from school for a little while longer.

I glanced down at her t-shirt and realized that during my pity party the day before, I hadn't bothered to pay attention to who was on her shirt. That certainly would not happen again, and I made a mental note to always pay attention to that from now on.

 _Hmm, The Misfits._ I'd never heard of them.

The ride went by faster than it had the day before; of course, I also wasn't experiencing restless leg syndrome this time either. All too soon, we pulled into the parking lot. Emmett's car wasn't there yet, which was a good thing because it meant I could avoid what would surely be the wrath of Alice as soon as she saw me.

I pulled the keys out of the ignition, and Bella immediately swung open her door as I sat still, going through my usual morning routine. She turned to me and gave me a funny look.

"What are you doing?"

"Huh?"

Bella laughed. "Edward, it looks like you're scoping out the parking lot."

Crap! She'd noticed, and I really didn't want to have to explain to her how I had to keep a constant lookout for Mike Newton in order to avoid getting my ass kicked. Something told me that wouldn't impress her in the slightest. "I just like to know who's around before I get out of my car, be aware of my surroundings and stuff."

"Um, okay."

Suddenly, a thought occurred to me, and I couldn't believe I'd been such an idiot before then. " _Wait!_ Quick, close your door."

She gave me the same funny look, but quickly pulled her feet back in the car and closed the door.

"Don't move," I said as I stepped out of the car, slamming the door behind me. I walked around the front and over to her side, opening her door for her. "Okay, you can get out now."

She shook her head as if in disbelief and stepped out, wrapping her arm through one of the straps of her book bag. "Thanks, silly boy. But if you can't tell, I'm not exactly one of those poor, helpless woman types."

"Yes, I've noticed. But that doesn't mean I still can't be a gentleman," I said, shutting the door behind her.

Bella and I began to walk together toward the school, and it didn't take long before I realized everyone in the parking lot was staring at us and whispering. I immediately looked at the ground, trying to hide myself from their glares until we were safely inside.

We headed straight for our lockers and Bella reached hers first, which to my luck, wasn't too far from mine. I grabbed a couple of my books and threw my lunch in just as Ben walked up.

"Hey, man." Ben looked at me and then over toward Bella before shooting me a smirk.

"It's not a big deal," I said, trying my best to play it off even though to me it was a tremendously _huge_ deal. "Her truck broke down yesterday, and she needed a ride."

"Uh huh," Ben said but temporarily dropped the subject when Bella walked over.

"Hi, Ben!"

"Hey, what's up, Bella?"

"Not much. Gotta get to class. See you guys at lunch. Bye, Edward."

"Oh, see…see you later," I stuttered as she walked away, and Ben broke out into a laugh.

"Man, you are in deep!"

"Takes one to know one." I slammed my locker shut, and Ben and I headed off to class.

Unfortunately, Ben was not the only one who wanted to talk to me about my new "relationship" with Bella. All morning, there was at least one person in each of my classes who tapped me on the shoulder to ask if we were together. I also heard various whispering and snickers in my direction as I walked down the hall between classes. The same people who had avoided me throughout all of high school were now trying to talk to me, and the attention was definitely the last thing I ever wanted.

But it didn't last very long.

As I made my way to my locker before lunch, I noticed everyone was acting really weird, I mean way weirder than normal, and there was a group that had gathered around one of the sets of lockers ahead of me. I grabbed my lunch out of my locker and continued on, finally approaching whatever it was everyone was gawking at.

My jaw dropped when I finally saw it. I didn't really understand where it came from or who would say such a cruel thing about her. In fact, it was probably the furthest thing from the truth, or at least what I knew about her.

I just stood there, like the rest, and stared at the words that were scrawled across her locker in black permanent marker.

_ROSALIE HALE IS A WHORE!_


	5. Chapter 5

_And I don't want you and I don't need you  
Don't bother to resist, or I'll beat you  
It's not your fault that you're always wrong  
The weak ones are there to justify the strong_

_The beautiful people, the beautiful people  
It's all relative to the size of your steeple  
You can't see the forest for the trees  
You can't smell your own shit on your knees_

_There's no time to discriminate,  
Hate every motherfucker  
That's in your way_

_Hey you, what do you see?  
Something beautiful, something free?  
Hey you, are you trying to be mean?  
If you live with apes man, it's hard to be clean_

_The worms will live in every host  
It's hard to pick which one they eat most_

_The horrible people, the horrible people  
It's as anatomic as the size of your steeple  
Capitalism has made it this way,  
Old-fashioned fascism will take it away_

_The Beautiful People – Marilyn Manson_

^0-0^

"Where are you going to get a samurai sword?"

I walked into the cafeteria to hear Ben's voice sounding above all the others. He was obviously worked up about something.

"On the internet. Where are you going to get a machine gun?" Bella shot back at him.

"At a gun store. _Duh._ "

"Right, except that you're only sixteen and don't have a gun license. They'll never sell one to you, and by the time anyone even realizes the apocalypse is nigh, it'll be too late to make a quick pit stop at Forks Guns and Ammo. And besides, would you even know how to use a machine gun if you had one?"

Everyone had made it to lunch before me, so I took my usual seat at our table, which now meant right next to Bella, and watched Ben's face scrunch up as he pondered her question. "Erm, no. I guess not."

"That's what I thought." A satisfied smirk spread across her face, and then she turned her attention to me. "What about you, Edward? What's your zombie apocalypse weapon?" I guess Ben told her about our game.

"Uh, well, I'd probably go with a shotgun."

" _What?_ That's even worse than a machine gun! It's too slow," Bella lectured, waving an unpeeled banana at me. "If you're surrounded, you need a weapon that'll keep you at least an arm's length away but will also allow you to take out more than one at a time, like a samurai sword."

I flinched and slid back slightly. It wasn't that I didn't want to be as close to Bella as possible. It was just a little hard for me to think clearly when a banana was coming within centimeters of smacking me in the face. "Um, how do you know this?"

"I'm the daughter of a cop. Trust me; I know things…even if some of those things are completely irrational."

I didn't really know what to say to that, so I just hummed in response and then proceeded to dump the contents of my lunch bag out on the table: one turkey sandwich, one oatmeal cookie sandwich, one bag of Cool Ranch Doritos, and two juice boxes of Hi-C Ecto Cooler. I looked over at Bella to see she had finally unpeeled and was happily eating her banana. She took small bites, almost as if she was trying to make it last longer, and I wondered if it was because she really liked bananas or if, just like the other day, a piece of fruit was the only thing she had for lunch. I wanted to ask her, but I surely didn't want to be rude, so instead I unwrapped my sandwich, took half, and pushed the other half toward her. "Uh, I'm not real hungry. It's turkey, if you want it."

She smiled and reached for it. "Thanks."

I nodded and was just about to bite into my half when the heavy, metal doors to the cafeteria flew open, slamming into the walls behind them. The crash echoed throughout the lunchroom, startling everyone. A hushed silence took over at the sight of him.

He slowly stalked through the cafeteria, each step echoing through the quiet room, scanning every face at each table. It was pretty obvious what he was doing, and I glanced a few tables over to where Alice sat. Her eyes met mine and widened in acknowledgment, and we both knew it was inevitable – Emmett was going to kill somebody.

He continued his pace, through the lunch room and in between the tables where students who could be the most likely suspects sat, before coming to a stop at one table in particular and glaring at the two blondes that smirked up at him. He fought to hold back his anger, keeping his voice low and speaking to them slowly. "I know you two think I can't touch you because you're girls, and you're right about that. I can't touch you. Physically. But if you think you're going to get away with this, just like every other fucked up thing the two of you have done to her, then you're stupid as shit. If the school won't do anything about this, then I will be sure to do everything I can to make your lives hell. Payback's a bitch, bitches."

The metal legs of a chair screeched across the tile floor on the opposite side of the cafeteria as Mike Newton quickly stood up. I had been so preoccupied with Bella I hadn't even noticed he was back, and by what could only be some sort of divine intervention, he hadn't approached me…yet. "Stay the hell away from my sister, Cullen."

"Or what, Newton? You gonna kick my ass? I'd really like to see you try." Emmett snickered as he charged across the cafeteria in Mike's direction, not stopping until they were chest to chest, Emmett pushing Mike back slightly. "I'll even let you go first. C'mon, hit me, motherfucker."

Just then, Coach Clapp stormed into the cafeteria and immediately pulled Emmett and Mike apart from each other, shoving a finger in each of their chests. "That's enough! Newton, sit down. Cullen, out, now!"

Emmett turned and stormed out through the same doors, pulling them open with as much force as he did when he came in. Coach Clapp followed Emmett out, and once the tension had cooled, it didn't take long for the gossiping voices that usually filled the cafeteria to return, though a bit louder than normal now.

I hoped Emmett wasn't going to get in too much trouble over this, but I couldn't blame him for wanting to defend Rose. Mom wasn't going to be too happy about it, though. I looked back over at Alice, and she was looking down at the table, nervously pushing her salad around on her plate. I guess she was worried about Emmett's fate as well. I turned my attention back to my sandwich, and Bella looked over at me.

"That Mike kid called that big guy Cullen. Are you related to him?" she asked.

I bit into my sandwich and answered with a mouth full of food. So much for manners. "Yeah. He's my brother."

Bella's eyes grew wide. "Is he always that angry?"

"No. He's usually really happy. Someone wrote something not very nice on his girlfriend's locker," I said, poking my straw into my juice box.

"Oh, and he thinks those two girls did it?"

I swallowed the bite and took a sip of my juice while Slimer smiled at me from the box. "I guess. Not sure why, though. I thought Rosalie was friends with them. I used to see them together all the time."

"I bet Angela knows." Ben smirked and teasingly bumped Angela's shoulder with his. "She knows everything that goes on around here."

Angela gasped. "I do not!"

"Yes, you do. Come on, spill it, Ang!"

Bella looked confused, so I let her in on the secret. "Angela's on the school newspaper."

Angela looked down at the table and nervously picked the outer layer of chocolate off her swiss cake roll. "Well, I heard something about it a while back, but it's not really my place to say."

"That's just mean, Ang! You can't just say you know something and then not tell us," Ben whined.

"But it's just a rumor! I don't even know how true it is. It could be a complete fabrication."

Angela was right. Chances were whatever the rumor was, it was probably completely wrong and totally inaccurate. They usually were in Forks. That still didn't keep us from wanting to know though, so the three of us stared at her until she finally gave in. We're all guilty of peer pressure once in a while, I guess.

"Fine." Angela sighed, looked across at Bella, and inconspicuously pointed to the table where the two blondes sat. "Tanya Denali, Kate Newton, and Rosalie Hale used to be joined at the hip. Best friends forever. They were also, like, the biggest bitches on the planet. But last year, right before Emmett and Rosalie started dating, something supposedly happened."

"What happened?" Ben asked.

Angela hesitated for a second. She looked really uncomfortable, and I suddenly felt guilty for being a party to this whole conversation, but then she continued, whispering the rest of the story to us. "It's just the rumor I heard, but supposedly, Kate was dating this college guy, Royce. Anyway, he would take Kate to all of these college parties, and Tanya and Rosalie would tag along. Well, one night, Royce texts Rosalie about this party that he and Kate are already at, inviting her to come along; only when Rosalie gets there, Kate's nowhere to be found. So Rosalie gets really drunk and ends up hooking up with Royce. Kate found out not long after, and she and Tanya completely turned on Rosalie. I guess once Rosalie got a dose of her own medicine, she stopped being so mean to people."

"What does that mean – dose of her own medicine? What did they do to her?" Bella asked.

Angela shrugged. "Spreading rumors about her, calling her names, stuff like that. I heard they cornered her in the locker room once, but I don't know the details about that. Anyway, I heard all of this from Vicky who heard it from Jane, so I wouldn't believe too much of it. Neither one of them are known for their fact checking. And I should know. You can't even imagine how much of their stories I have to edit out for the paper."

I tried to remember the last time I'd seen Rosalie with anyone but Emmett. Actually thinking about it, I realized she never came into the cafeteria. Emmett usually came in alone and carried out two lunches. He told me once that she wasn't comfortable around a lot of people, but I just figured she was shy or something. I didn't know how true what Angela had told us was, but it was hard to believe that someone as attractive and popular as Rosalie Hale would have the same type of problems I did. Newton and I had never been friends – in fact, he'd tortured me since kindergarten – but Rosalie had been friends with those girls once, and now, for whatever reason, they were treating her so cruelly. I couldn't imagine the hurt she must have felt because of it. I suddenly had an even greater respect for Emmett. He was popular, yet he treated everybody equally and with the same respect. It took a big person to do that. Especially in Forks.

"So, you got any other brothers or sisters?" Bella asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I nodded. "Yup. See that harp…uh…that small girl at that table over there? That's my twin sister, Alice."

"You have a twin? Awesome!" Bella took a bite of my sandwich. "What's up with that guy next to her?

"That's Jasper Whitlock – her boyfriend."

"Yeah, he's in my history class, but –" she cocked her eyebrow and turned to me "– why does he always look like that?"

"Look like what?"

"Like he's in pain."

I nearly snorted my Ecto-Cooler all over her. "You'd look like that too if you dated Alice. His eardrums are probably ruptured from the sound of her voice. I know mine are."

"That's not a very nice thing to say about your sister, Edward."

"You don't know my sister. She makes it really easy to say not-nice things about her."

"Well, she's still your sister. You should be nice to each other. I'd love a brother or sister. Being an only child blows."

The rest of the afternoon went by without any other major occurrences, and everything seemed to have gotten back to normal by sixth period. I walked into biology class to see that Bella had beaten me there and Mike Newton was leaning over our table, talking to her. My instincts told me to run. When it came to fight or flight, I was most definitely a flighter, but before I had the chance, Mr. Banner came in behind me.

"Problem, Mr. Cullen?"

"Uh, no, sir."

"Well, then take a seat."

"Yes, sir." I hesitantly started toward my table, but with each step I took, my heart pounded, my knees shook, my ears rang, and I thought for sure I was going to see my turkey sandwich again. He was going to do something, I just knew it, and to make matters worse, he was going to do it in front of Bella.

I made it to the table and slumped down in my seat, trying my best to avoid any and all eye contact with "the Dick." The panic was so great that I couldn't even hear what they were talking about over the sound of my pulse beating in my ears. I just prayed for a quick and painless start to class…or death…whichever came first.

"What's up, Ednerd? Not gonna say hi? That's a little rude, don't you think?"

I cringed. _Oh, God. Here it comes._ "Hello, Mike," I mumbled just loud enough so he could hear it.

Newton smirked, but surprisingly he directed his attention back to Bella. Was that it? Was that the sole means of torture he was going to inflict upon me today?

"So, what time should I pick you up?"

Pick her up? What the hell was he talking about? They surely didn't have a date or something. They couldn't. There was no way she would ever go for a guy like Newton…would she? Oh, God. This was it. He'd found a new way to torture me. He was going to take Bella from me.

Not that she was mine to begin with, but I should've known this was going to happen. I was such an idiot to think Bella and I could be something more than we were. I knew she would never have really gone for a guy like me. She'd want someone popular, someone athletic, someone with good looks...someone like Newton. This was the end, I knew it. I had just lost her forever.

But then Bella huffed. "I already told you. Quarter-to-never."

"Hmm, yeah, we'll see. You know, Isabella, it pays to hang out with right people here. You'll learn that soon enough."

Mike headed back to his seat, and as soon as he was gone, Bella rolled her eyes. "Wow, that was the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Isabella? Whatever. Has that kid always been such a douche?"

A single, relieved laugh escaped me and a "Yeah" was the only response I could manage.

She pulled a tube of Chap Stick out of her jeans pocket, swiped it across her lips, and then smacked them together a couple of times. "And who exactly are the 'right' people anyway?" she asked, pulling her left leg up underneath her and turning her body toward me.

 _Not me, that's for sure,_ I thought,but I just shrugged in response instead.

^0-0^

I swear, Fridays had to be the absolute longest day of the week, and when the last bell finally rang, everyone rushed out of the building, anxious to start their weekend. But I hung back, letting the rest of the Forks student body pass me by so that I could hopefully make my way through the parking lot without any incidents. With Newton back, I couldn't be too cautious.

Bella was already standing at my car when I finally walked outside, but she didn't notice me right away. She had her ear buds in and was looking down at her iPod, her body bouncing along to whatever song she was listening to. God, she was hot…I mean _beautiful!_ She was beautiful. _Damn it, Edward._

"What are you listening to?"

She startled and her face turned pink as I walked up to her. Then she pulled her ear buds out and shyly looked up at me. I had never seen her like this before, so I wondered what could have been so bad.

"What are you listening to?" I asked again.

"Promise you won't tell anyone?"

"Uh, okay. I promise."

"Beat It. I'm a closet Michael Jackson fan."

I chuckled a bit. "Is that a bad thing?"

"It's just, you know, pop. Once people think you're a pop fan they start assuming you like things like the Goo Goo Dolls, and Lady Gaga, and Baby Goo Goo."

"Who's Baby Goo Goo?"

She shrugged. "I have no idea, but I'm sure he'll exist someday. So, got any plans for tonight?"

Ha! She obviously didn't know me very well yet. "No. You?"

"No, but it's Friday. I don't really want to go home yet. Isn't there somewhere around here we could go for a while, like the diner or something?"

"Erm, well, yeah, we could go to the diner if you want. I guess a lot of people hang out there after school."

A disappointed look crossed her face as she leaned back against my car. "Oh, really? I'm not really feeling being around a lot of people. I kinda just wanted to hang out with you."

 _With me? Holy shit!_ "Um, well, there is this place I know; uh, I kind of go there sometimes when I need to get away." I could hear myself saying the words, but it was too late to stop them. I couldn't believe I was actually suggesting we go there. What the hell was wrong with me? I was really going to have to do something about these communication issues I seemed to have with Bella. I either said too much or not enough. I swear, it was like I had irritable oral syndrome, alternating back and forth between verbal constipation and diarrhea.

"Cool. What is it?"

"Huh?"

"Does it have a name?"

"No, not really. Not anymore, I mean."

She gave me a suspicious look, and I really couldn't blame her. I definitely couldn't have been any vaguer than I was.

"All right, let's go then."

^0-0^

"Edward, where are we going?" Bella asked for the first time since we'd left school. She followed behind me as I pushed through weeds and overgrowth that covered an old, dirt hiking path on the outskirts of the Forks woods. I guess she was finally starting to get nervous; my behavior was bordering on serial killer level now.

"Not much farther, I promise."

"Oookay."

Finally, we made it to the end of the path and walked through a row of trees before reaching the edge of a clearing. The tan-colored weeds from the trail continued out and covered the ground in front of us while the swings on an old, rusty swing set swayed in the breeze, and a pile of dead leaves blew across a squeaky merry-go-round that rested between a slide and a wobbly teeter-totter.

"It's a park."

I nodded. "It _was_ a park. Now it's just…this."

"What happened?"

I shrugged. "It was supposed to be a big deal when they first built it. They were planning on building picnic areas and gazebos and all that park stuff, but nobody came, so they just gave up.

Bella walked across the clearing, stopped at the old swing set, and sat in one of the swings.

"You might want to be careful. It's really old."

She pushed herself back with her feet and swung forward. "Swing with me, Edward."

"Uh, I really don't think that's a good idea. It could come down at any second." I walked over to the old merry-go-round, brushed the leaves away, and sat on the edge, watching her get more and more height as she kicked her feet back even harder with each pass. The swing set squeaked and creaked as she did, and I was sure I would be lifting the entire contraption off of her at any moment. Then, just as she reached her highest point, she launched herself off of the seat, flying through the air, and landed in a crouched position on the ground. She laughed and pushed herself up, brushing the dirt off of her hands.

"You should try it, Edward. It's fun."

"That's all right. I like to keep my feet on the ground."

"I've noticed." Bella walked over and sat down next to me, pulling her leather jacket tighter around her to keep away the chilly air. "Sucks what happened to this place. Why didn't anybody come? It's beautiful here."

I shrugged. "People in Forks are just, I don't know, not into places like this I guess. They'd rather be places where they can be seen."

"You don't like to be seen, do you, Edward?"

My face flushed, and I instinctively leaned forward and looked at the ground so my hair would hide her view of me. "It's not really that. People just _don't_ see me."

I felt a light tap on my arm and turned my head to see that Bella was leaning forward now, too, and she was looking at me, directly into my eyes.

"I see you."

A part of me wanted to turn away and quickly break the awkwardness of the situation, like when you inadvertently make eye contact with a stranger in public and then look away and try to convince yourself that it didn't happen. But another part of me wanted to smile. It wanted to stay in that place forever, just staring straight at the beauty that was Bella, and the longer I looked, the more comfortable I became, with her. "What, um…what do you see…when you see me, I mean?"

She smiled, and when she did, her eyes squinted a bit. "What do I see? I see a guy who's nice, and smart, and funny as hell. I see a guy who appreciates beautiful things and nature and people. I see a guy who's both shy and witty at the same time. And, most importantly, I see a guy who's a good friend, and generous, and would share his lunch with anyone who asked. I don't know how anyone couldn't see you, Edward. They do. Don't ever think they don't."

I felt a lump forming in the back of my throat and quickly fought it back. I wasn't really sure how true any of what she'd said was or if anyone else saw me that way, but I kind of hoped it was. At least, I hoped that really was how she saw me. I didn't really know how to respond to her without losing control of my emotions though, so I tried to focus the conversation back onto her. "Um, so, about that, why do you like eating my lunch so much anyway?" I asked, trying to keep my tone light and happy, but her smile faded, and a look of sadness took its place.

Then she broke our gaze and looked at the ground, sighing. "Because it tastes like a mom made it."

She nervously dug the front of her sneakers into the dirt, still looking down, and I realized then that there was more to Bella than the hair and the piercings and the concert t-shirts. Underneath the bright colors and the snarky sarcasm, she was just as vulnerable as I was, only in a different way. She missed her mom, or, maybe, she missed the mom she never really had.

I knew in that moment that I had nothing to fear from her. I had no reason to be nervous around her or to worry about saying or doing the wrong thing. And if I did in some way make a fool of myself, as was quite common with me, she wouldn't laugh at me too much or make me feel bad. I felt a sudden blast of courage, and I guess that's where it came from, knowing she was just like me and that maybe we really could be friends.

"Do you want to come to my house for dinner tomorrow? Saturdays are pizza night, so no big deal if you can't, but if you want to, I'd like you to."

Her feet stopped digging in the ground, and she tilted her head back toward me and cocked her eyebrow. "Yeah?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

Then she smiled again, and it was the most beautiful smile I had ever seen.


End file.
